Simple, but not Clean
by Phate Phoenix
Summary: A little peak into Riku's thoughts before he decided to join Malificent for real. May have some unintentional hinting at RikuXKairi, and a little intentional SoraXKairi. Read and Review. OneShot


**Simple, but Not Clean**

_It is hard to explain the feeling of having known you were being taken over, but yet felt as though you were oblivious to it. Almost like denial, I fought so hard to believe that _I_ was in control of the darkness, of my heart. But now... I suppose I failed Sora. I failed him. He trusted me as a leader, but I only lead myself into thinking that the Darkness is something that can be tamed. Ansem was insane. You can't control the darkness. Darkness controls you._

Riku watched quietly as Malificent spoke to the others in their plot. Oogie-Boogie turned his sack-like body toward the now-speaking Ursula. The half-octopus sea-witch ran a lavander-colored hand through her white hair, gloating again.

"So I'm trying to get one of Trident's daughters over to my side. Arial, that red-headed twit I told you about, seems to be slightly distanced from him, so she's my target now. Once I locate that Keyhole, I can connect Atlantis and we will have one more world in our hands! Ah-hahaha!"

Hades sneered at her.

"Man, I'm working on the Collesium, but that little rat Sora..."

There was a dead silence as the door to the main hall slammed next to them. Malificent sighed, placing her hand on her forehead.

"He is still attached to the boy, Hades. Be careful what you say."

Riku, after hearing that, stormed down the hallway and into the Library. His ocean blue eyes flicked around, hoping for some sort of explanation.

_I thought I was doing everything to find Kairi. I had convinced myself that Sora had abandoned us, or me, at least. He was searching for Kairi, but he didn't seem all that worried about his silver-haired friend. I know that I was wrong to think that. I... I think I was jealous of her._ _She, being female and supposedly weak, made Sora's older-brother or boyfriend-protector_ _instincts kick in. I was fine, sure, but I couldn't help but feel... alone._

Riku walked over to a stack of books. He glared at them and kicked it, sending the books all over. He fumed.

"Sora... at the Collesium? I thought he said he had been searching for Kairi and me?"

Riku ran a gloved hand through his silver hair. He glowered for a second before walking through the book cases.

_That was when I thought I figured Sora out- he was having a great time exploring the worlds and playing with his new friends that mine and Kairi's, but mostly mine, safety had been placed on the back burner. That made me mad._

Riku turned his blazing blue gaze the book shelf. He grabbed a book, throwing it across the room.

"Darn it... Sora... DARN IT SORA!"

He stared at eh complete mess he had made of the library. His face flushed, he bolted to the upper floor and out onto the upper hallway.As he did,Riku's eyes washed over the marble surfaces and the floating platforms. Riku rolled his eyes.

"Such a stupidway to hide a key. Sora isn't smart enough to look under a doormat.

Riku sighed and tapped his fingers on the railing. He stared out over the railing, and blinked before setting his head on his arms and sighing.

_I was lonely. Sora was nowhere near me. Kairi... annoying-yet-cute Kairi was still missing. Malificent said she was getting very close to her, though. Many Heartless reported seeing a little girl to her. Looking back on it now, I think I was more trying to prove to myself that I could save Kairi when Sora couldn't. I was using both of them, and Malificent was using me. What goes around, comes around._

Riku listened, and when he heard the tell-tale tapping of a certain pirates shoes, Riku knew what he had to do. He eyes looked down and running though the entry doors was none other that the black-haired, hook-handed Captain Hook. Riku detected urgency in his steps. Riku's heart fluttered for a second, recalling that this space pirate had the very important mission of retreaving Kairi.He turned on his heal and headed back for the meeting room.

Riku panted as he walked into the meeting hall, nearly running into the black-and-violet-donned Malificent. He took a step back. Malificent smiled sweetly.

"Wonderful news, Riku. Captain Hook has found your friend Kairi. But, I should tell you-"

Riku turned on his heel and bolted out of the meeting hall. Malificent shook her head, but a wicked grin crossed her face.

"Poor boy. He'll want to go and search for a way to revive her..."

_I should have listened. Waited. Done anything to stop myself from going to Captain Hook's boat. But I didn't I ran as hard and as fast as I could to get to that boat. I wasn't prepared for what had happened..._

Riku jumped off of the final rock, landing on the Pirate Ship. Riku dashed inside the boat's cabin, and halted, his chest tight. In front of him, laying on a red couch, was the red-haired, violet-eyed Kairi. He walked over to her and stared down at her face.

Kairi's eyes were open, but the pupils were shrunk. She opened and shut her mouth, trying to speak but had no thoughts to communicate. Riku's entire body shivered as he realized what this meant.

"Kairi... Kairi... your heart... I-I can't sense your Heart!"

_My senses had expanded from your ordinary touch, taste, see, smell, and hear. I became acutely aware of Hearts. Darkness in Hearts would help amplify this sense, but in Kairi's case, there was no Darkness, no Light, no Heart._

Riku's legs collapsed beneath him, causing him to fall to his knees. He bowed his head, closing tear-filled eyes in shock.

"I-I'm sorry... I'm so sorry I didn't find you earlier..."

Riku's sadness erupted into fury, and a green glow overtook his figure.

"Sora... if Sora hadn't have been screwing around, you'd be fine! You'd be smiling and laughing! Even if he had found you first, you'd be okay! But no. He had to go play. He abandoned us, Kairi. And I swear, if it isn't the last thing I do, I'll make him pay for it. I swear."

Malificent's footsteps approached them. Riku looked up, bitter tears streaming down his face. She blinked at him and Kairi.

"If you and I get to Kingdom Hearts, we will surely find a way to rebind Kairi to her Heart. Riku, Sora will stand in our way. Are you-"

"If he attempted to halt us, I'll kill him," Riku said firmly, not wavering from his earlier decision. Malificanet gleamed.

"Wonderful. You and Captain Hook are going to investigate a report of a wooden puppet that functions normally as if it were alive, yet it has no Heart."

Riku nodded and stared at Kairi. He clenched his fist.

"Am at your disposal."

Maificent grinned.

"Good. Now you are in control of this ship, and Captain Hook for that matter. Leave immediately."

Riku nodded.

"Yes Malificent."

Riku turned around, listening to the door close behind him. He leaned forward and grasped Kairi's hand with his and smiled at her.

"We'll make this okay. Everything will be okay."

_I never understood Sora's story, just as I bet he never understood mine. We never were able to sit down and talk face to face. I was too full of anger and he too full of shock. I wish... I wish I had now. Then I could have seen that Sora had two Hearts instead of one. I could have put two and two together, and I would not be sitting here, behind this door. I could be with them, smiling. I could have, but I didn't. Darkness runs to deep in my Heart and I am sure Sora still will have trouble facing me. And I don't know if I want to face him._

_My Heart's choice was to seek revenge. It was simple, but not clean._


End file.
